I get outraged about ancient events like the Spanish Inquisition, but I’m totally numb about current events. I maintain a curious and determined ignorance about the current state of the union. Getting mad at the president and the political climate is too much. I disagree with nearly everything Drumpf says or does… How can I maintain outrage over every stupid Twitter comment or political atrocity? His political empire is like a square-mile-sized fire ant mound — I cannot get heartburn over every individual ant. I have to just let it be…
Last night, I got a text from a random person at the Sierra Club, asking me to call my senator regarding disapproval of Kavanagh, the next likely Supreme Court pick. I’m sure Kavanaugh is terrible. But I also am sure he’ll get voted in — any phone call I make to my senator won’t make a difference. The more terrible the pick is, the more likely it is that he’ll get voted in.
Starting the morning after Drumpf’s election, I woke up every morning feeling depressed, like someone had died. It took me about six months to get through my mourning period for this country. Now, I’m numbly coping. I’m zombie-walking through my life. I don’t have the emotional capacity for outrage. I don’t want to spend all my time thinking about politics, or going to political rally’s or calling congresspeople or having “it’s all falling apart” discussions, so I’m doing other things: I’m trying comedy classes, and blogging. I’m reading simple YA books with happy endings, and I’m watching dumb romantic comedies with no aliens or zombies. I’m falling down various rabbit holes that are giving me spiritual purpose.
But I’m not being political, because I just… can’t. I’m not not fixing the environment or my country with my influence… I’m merely maintaining my own emotion health and my physical health, and hoping that I can survive these next few years without going completely bonkers. I cannot let a revolting old orange tyrant get to me.